Questions About The World of Heroes of Might & Magic V

[Ridureyu]

Does Kujin use superglue to keep that necklace in place?

Why haven't Haggash, Garuna, and the Sky Daughter shared their secrets of "wearing a shirt" with the other orc women?
(RELATED: Somebody needs to make a graphical mod giving Kujin an "I'm with Stupid" t-shirt)

Where were the Sylvan elves during the whole "Let's everybody (even the necromancers) team up to beat the devils!" plotline during Tribes of the East? On vacation in Rio?

Speaking of that, where was Raelag when Isabel finally returned? Did she smother him with a pillow?

If Zehir sat down and wrote a tell-all book, how many copies would sell?

Do Thanes ever get annoyed with how everything around them is built for Dwarf-sized Dwarves?

How does Kythra breathe? That looks like it would be painful. And how does she deal with chafing?

Why do none of the necromancer heroes resemble skeletons?

Why is it that Veyer gets his own model, but Nebiros doesn't?

Is Orlando's last name Bloom?

How do the blade dancers feel about their girly-girly voices?

How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?

Whose face is Deleb wearing?

How many people could the succubi seduce if they DIDN'T disguise themselves?

Holy crap, is the Succubus Mistress on fire... down there?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Why do the goblins get such a raw deal?

Why do the Nilbogs live in Utah?

If Dark Messiah ends with the main character sealing Kha-Beleth in hell again, does that mean that all of his evil plans fizzled because of a spur-of-the-moment decision?

How long ago did orc culture switch from Aztec to Mongol?

And when did they decide that shirts are for looooosers?

Why does the normal Shaman look totally indistinguishable from human?

What would happen if Grawl decided to breed bichons, instead?

Why can't I have a pet Deep Hydra? I want my pet Deep Hydra!

Why did Biara do such a better job of protecting herself than Isabel?

How much wood would a treant chuck if a treant could chuck wood?

[ShadowLiberal]

Good questions, here's some of mine.

How does Ylaya get off her mount when her head goes right through her flagpole?

Why is the Rakshasa Rani dressed like a female (the cloth looks like a bra) when both upgrades are clearly males?

How are living creatures like Shadow Dragons upgraded into complete different species of dragons?

It's said that demons aren't allowed to stay in the real world forever, so what happens if a demon enters the real world and refuses to go back to Shaeog? (I probably just butchered the spelling for that)

If Black Dragons are immune to magic then why can my summoned phoenix hurt and kill them?

If the Orcs are so against slavery then why do they allow selling creatures into slavery for gold?

Can I get a Blood Fury to go out with me?

[Ridureyu]

Good questions, here's some of mine.

How does Ylaya get off her mount when her head goes right through her flagpole?

She takes it with her.

Why is the Rakshasa Rani dressed like a female (the cloth looks like a bra) when both upgrades are clearly males?

Manboobs need support, too.

How are living creatures like Shadow Dragons upgraded into complete different species of dragons?

Evolution works in mysterious ways.

It's said that demons aren't allowed to stay in the real world forever, so what happens if a demon enters the real world and refuses to go back to Shaeog? (I probably just butchered the spelling for that)

Then not only do they have to go back, but they also get a 10-minute time-out on the Naughty Chair.

If Black Dragons are immune to magic then why can my summoned phoenix hurt and kill them?

A wizard did it.

If the Orcs are so against slavery then why do they allow selling creatures into slavery for gold?

Because everybody's a hypocrite. See, quite often, the Oppressed soon become the Oppressors once they ha-WOAH KUJIN HAD A WARDROBE MALFUNCTION RHAYAAAA sorry, I got distracted. Where were we? Oh uh, because dunno.

Can I get a Blood Fury to go out with me?

No, she's only into minotaurs.

[ShadowLiberal]

Since I have a few minutes I'll repay the favor and answer some of your questions.

Do Thanes ever get annoyed with how everything around them is built for Dwarf-sized Dwarves?

They're fine with dwarf sized doorways, they can just teleport through it, but not dwarf tall floors!

And when did they decide that shirts are for looooosers?

It's a different culture, in heroes 5 a lot of people/creatures view shirts as a nerd thing. Who wants to declare they're a nerd to everyone?

Why does the normal Shaman look totally indistinguishable from human?

Some girls decided to play dress up, and landed in the middle of an orc army.

Why can't I have a pet Deep Hydra? I want my pet Deep Hydra!

So do I! But Raelag banned Deep Hydra pets after he learned that assassins and stalkers were torturing them by using them as training dummies and confusing them so they couldn't fight back!

How much wood would a treant chuck if a treant could chuck wood?

A whole treant's worth! After that they run out of wood to chuck.

[Yinnight]

I really need some help, i love heroes III complete and i bought "heroes ov might and magic IV" and it was a shitty RPG, is there anymore games like heroes of might and magic III complete???? please help me

[Mirez]

Well....
You found your way to the heroes 5 forum so you might want to check that out. Then there's also heroes 6...

[Ell1e]

Hmm, let's see if I can answer some of those interesting questions...

Does Kujin use superglue to keep that necklace in place?

Pao Kai spit. Don't ask.

Where were the Sylvan elves during the whole "Let's everybody (even the necromancers) team up to beat the devils!" plotline during Tribes of the East? On vacation in Rio?

Since it was Tribes if the East this means they'd just gotten the alternative upgrades. So all the elves were busy trying out those new hairstyles and putting flowers in the unicorns' manes. You know how elves are.

If Zehir sat down and wrote a tell-all book, how many copies would sell?

The book would be called "How I Saved The World Twice Because Nobody Else Was Cool Enough". It would be banned in every single land, except for the Seven Cities, because Zehir would put it on the curriculum.

Why do none of the necromancer heroes resemble skeletons?

There was a skeleton hero several hundred years ago, but his troops kept mistaking him for a regular skeleton. They try to avoid this.

Is Orlando's last name Bloom?

He isn't supported by a legion of screaming Legolas-fangirls, so I'd assume no.

How do the blade dancers feel about their girly-girly voices?

They're elves. These are their regular voices. Besides, it's not nearly as bad as the "Yee-HAW" the Sharpshooters do.

How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?

One, if he can find a partner and if the dance is a Gavotte.

Holy crap, is the Succubus Mistress on fire... down there?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Yes. Demons are fireproof, so they don't care, but for humans this is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. It's a little known fact that no man who has ever been seduced by a Succubus Mistress has ever been able to feel pleasure with a regular woman again.

Why do the goblins get such a raw deal?

Cause they're goblins.

Why did Biara do such a better job of protecting herself than Isabel?

Because a goblin standing between a Shaman and a Cyclops does a better job of protecting itself than Miss "Let me just park my army at that garrison over there and go meet the elf dude I've seen several times already but still can't remember that he doesn't usually wear red armor.". Seriously, whenever I play that mission I park my army at the garrison and only take one peasant to illustrate this.

[Maciek]

Funny questions. I'll try to answer some:

Why haven't Haggash, Garuna, and the Sky Daughter shared their secrets of "wearing a shirt" with the other orc women?

Nobody treats Sky Daughters' advices on fashion seriously. Cruel Stronghold society laughs at them because they have no hair.

Speaking of that, where was Raelag when Isabel finally returned? Did she smother him with a pillow?

It was more serious than that, because when Ylaya found them in their love nest, they were wearing full armors. Or maybe they were just 'playing'? You never know with a Dark Elf. Besides, Raelag really didn't want to be near Isabel after Arantir returned her some of her memories.

Why does the normal Shaman look totally indistinguishable from human?

Bear skin on their heads must be hiding their horns.

How many people could the succubi seduce if they DIDN'T disguise themselves?

You greatly understimate human(-oids) stupidity.

I also have some questions:
Does Markal enjoy using the artifact Skull of Markal?

What did Crusaders say when they first saw pink Banshees?

Why is Zehir painting Titans green?