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Omega_Destroyer
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Unread postby Omega_Destroyer » 13 Feb 2007, 02:38

Bears are not cool to run into unexpectedly.
And the chickens. Those damn chickens.

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asandir
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Unread postby asandir » 13 Feb 2007, 02:50

not too bad if you're a tree apparently

and another one:
Jumping helps prevent pregnancy, Brits believe
Nearly one in three Britons think women can prevent pregnancy if they jump up and down, wash or urinate immediately after sex, a survey has revealed.

The country's Family Planning Association says its survey has found "widespread confusion and misunderstanding" about some of the basic facts of sex.

FPA chief executive Anne Weyman has called for improved sex and relationships education in schools, as Contraceptive Awareness Week begins in the UK.

"In today's sexualised society, we are bombarded with a multitude of sexual imagery and messages," Ms Weyman said.

"Nevertheless, providing people with the information and skills they need to make positive choices about their health and lives is not considered a priority."
and
Brazilian pries grandson from anaconda's death grip
A 66-year-old Brazilian man wrestled with a five-metre anaconda for nearly half-an-hour to free his grandson from the snake's crushing death grip, local media reported overnight.

Eight-year-old Matheus Pereira de Araujo would likely be dead inside the belly of the 35 kilogram anaconda if his grandfather had not heard his screams for help, zoologists said.

Anacondas, the biggest snakes in the world, live in swamps and rivers.

They kill prey by asphyxiation or drowning.

When the snake struck on Wednesday, Matheus, who lives in the the world's third largest metropolis of Sao Paulo, was playing with a cousin in a creek bed on his grandfather's farm 500 kilometres from the city in a town called Cosmorama.

"It was very fast," the boy said.

"I didn't have time to do anything."

"My grandfather is a hero - I was so afraid of dying."

Joaquim Pereira was driving home when he heard the screams of Matheus and his cousin Flavio, who ran to get help.

Mr Pereira jumped into the ravine and grappled with the snake, which started coiling around him as well.

"I started fighting the animal and tried to loosen its grip on the boy's neck but the snake was too strong," Mr Pereira told the Bom Dia newspaper of Sao Jose do Rio Preto.

Mr Pereira then attacked it with stones and a machete.

"I kept hitting it with the machete but it felt like a rubber tire, it wouldn't tear," he said.

He killed it after a long struggle to free the boy, who needed 21 stitches on his chest where the snake bit him.

"It was the most terrible scene that I've seen in my life," Mr Pereira said.

"It was totally coiled around him while he was screaming that he was dying."

Senator Eduardo Suplicy said Mr Pereira should be honoured by the Brazilian Government for heroism.
Human madness is the howl of a child with a shattered heart.

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winterfate
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Unread postby winterfate » 13 Feb 2007, 03:44

Jump up and down??

:rofl:

I could imagine why women believe the washing and urinating part, but jumping UP AND DOWN?!?!

Could someone please explain how that helps? :devious: (sorry, couldn't help myself).
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Unread postby asandir » 13 Feb 2007, 03:48

I don't know who they think any of it would help, how can they know so little about their own physiology????!!!
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winterfate
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Unread postby winterfate » 13 Feb 2007, 03:59

Lack of sexual education :D.

But that's changing...I hope. :)
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Omega_Destroyer
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Unread postby Omega_Destroyer » 13 Feb 2007, 04:08

And here I just thought they liked jumping jacks.
And the chickens. Those damn chickens.

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winterfate
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Unread postby winterfate » 13 Feb 2007, 04:10

:rofl:

I'm not even going to ask where you were aiming with that...

hahaha. That was evil, OD!

:rofl:
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asandir
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Unread postby asandir » 13 Feb 2007, 04:20

what has sexual eduation to do with the physiology of the female body? surely these women know the differences between the, now how do I put this in PG, different organs down there .... 8|
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winterfate
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Unread postby winterfate » 13 Feb 2007, 04:27

True, but more bizzare things have happened before... :D
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asandir
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Unread postby asandir » 13 Feb 2007, 04:55

but it's not just one or two women here .... .... :disagree:
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Unread postby Panda Tar » 13 Feb 2007, 10:40

Wow, for a moment I thought they have found a sucuri in São Paulo...I wonder what the boy was doing to be caught by that snake?

No matter how big or small they are, they are not that fast at all. You are only caught if you're swimming (they are fast there :D ) or when you're completely mind-absent or sleeping.
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Unread postby Corribus » 15 Feb 2007, 16:07

N.M. Orders 500 Talking Urinal Cakes

Feb 14, 9:48 PM (ET)

SANTA FE, N.M. (AP) - New Mexico is taking its fight against drunken driving to men's restrooms around the state. The state has ordered 500 talking urinal cakes that will deliver a recorded anti-DWI message to bar and restaurant patrons who make one last pit stop before getting behind the wheel.

"Hey there, big guy. Having a few drinks?" a female voice says a few seconds after an approaching male sets off a motion sensor in the device. "It's time to call a cab or ask a sober friend for a ride home."

Transportation Department spokesman S.U. Mahesh said the urinal cakes are a way to reach one group that's a target of state safety campaigns. Men commit about three times as many drunken-driving infractions as women.

The devices, manufactured by New York-based Healthquest Technologies Inc., were invented by Richard Deutsch. He said there's no other device like it on the market.

"The idea is based on the concept that there is no more captive audience than a guy standing at a urinal," Deutsch said. "You can't look right and you can't look left; you've got to look at the ad."

Public awareness campaigns in New York, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Minnesota and Australia have used the devices, as have commercial advertisers.

In New Mexico, the device uses the state DWI slogan "You drink, you drive, you lose."

Some Albuquerque bars installed the devices this week, and the state plans to distribute them to Santa Fe bars and restaurants as well as establishments in Farmington, Gallup and Las Cruces.

The state spent $21 for each talking urinal cake for the pilot program but will ask bars and restaurants to pay for future orders if the idea catch on, Mahesh said.

The cakes have enough battery power to last about three months.
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Unread postby Corribus » 15 Feb 2007, 16:10

Chinese Workers Paint Mountain Green

SHANGHAI, China (AP) - Villagers in southwestern China are scratching their heads over the county government's decision to paint an entire barren mountainside green.

Workers who began spraying Laoshou mountain last August told villagers they were doing so on orders of the county government but were not told why, media reports said Wednesday.

Some villagers guessed officials of the surrounding Fumin county, whose office building faces the mountain, were trying to change the area's feng shui - the ancient Chinese belief of harmonizing one's physical environment for maximum health and financial benefit.

Others speculated it was an unusual attempt at "greening" the area in keeping with calls for more attention to environmental protection. Photographs of the mountain showed the exposed rock covered in an artificial green the color of Astroturf looming over houses against a scrubby background.

The official Xinhua News Agency estimated the cost of the paint job at 470,000 yuan ($60,600) and quoted villagers saying that if spent on actual plants and trees, the money could have restored a far greater area of barren mountain.

Laoshou mountain was quarried for more than two decades but ordered shut recently following complaints about dust and noise from villagers.

Officials have also been trying to stem environmental damage in the surrounding Yunnan province where logging and development of mountain areas have been blamed for heavy floods down river.

A women who answered the phone at the Fumin county forestry department said they were also unaware of reasons behind the paint job.

"This is an order from above. You should ask the leader from above. I don't have any information on this," said the woman, who like many Chinese bureaucrats, refused to give her name.
"What men are poets who can speak of Jupiter if he were like a man, but if he is an immense spinning sphere of methane and ammonia must be silent?" - Richard P. Feynman

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Unread postby Corribus » 15 Feb 2007, 16:18

Truck Spills 40 Tons of Cow IntestinesFeb 9, 10:02 PM (ET)

SHEBOYGAN, Wis. (AP) - A truck driver distracted by his digital music player tipped his semitrailer on Thursday, spilling about 40 tons of cow intestines onto a major highway in eastern Wisconsin.

Parts of Interstate 43 were closed for about two hours while authorities cleaned up beef byproducts such as intestines and bones, said Sgt. Blaine Spicer of the Sheboygan County Sheriff's Department.

The accident happened in the Town of Mosel around 2:15 a.m. when 25-year-old Ryan Engle's truck veered off the road as he adjusted his MP3 player, Spicer said.

Engle, of Kenosha, was cited for inattentive driving, and taken to a hospital with non-life threatening injuries, Spicer said.

The semi had to be towed from the scene. It is owned by Birchwood Transport, of Kenosha.
"What men are poets who can speak of Jupiter if he were like a man, but if he is an immense spinning sphere of methane and ammonia must be silent?" - Richard P. Feynman

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Omega_Destroyer
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Unread postby Omega_Destroyer » 15 Feb 2007, 16:37

Someone's getting fired.
And the chickens. Those damn chickens.

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asandir
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Unread postby asandir » 16 Feb 2007, 14:04

SHANGHAI, China (AP) - Villagers in southwestern China are scratching their heads over the county government's decision to paint an entire barren mountainside green.

Workers who began spraying Laoshou mountain last August told villagers they were doing so on orders of the county government but were not told why, media reports said Wednesday.

Some villagers guessed officials of the surrounding Fumin county, whose office building faces the mountain, were trying to change the area's feng shui - the ancient Chinese belief of harmonizing one's physical environment for maximum health and financial benefit.

Others speculated it was an unusual attempt at "greening" the area in keeping with calls for more attention to environmental protection. Photographs of the mountain showed the exposed rock covered in an artificial green the color of Astroturf looming over houses against a scrubby background.

The official Xinhua News Agency estimated the cost of the paint job at 470,000 yuan ($60,600) and quoted villagers saying that if spent on actual plants and trees, the money could have restored a far greater area of barren mountain.

Laoshou mountain was quarried for more than two decades but ordered shut recently following complaints about dust and noise from villagers.

Officials have also been trying to stem environmental damage in the surrounding Yunnan province where logging and development of mountain areas have been blamed for heavy floods down river.

A women who answered the phone at the Fumin county forestry department said they were also unaware of reasons behind the paint job.

"This is an order from above. You should ask the leader from above. I don't have any information on this," said the woman, who like many Chinese bureaucrats, refused to give her name.
8| now that's just bureacracy gone horribly wrong!
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Omega_Destroyer
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Unread postby Omega_Destroyer » 16 Feb 2007, 16:34

That has to be one of the dumbest things I've ever read.
And the chickens. Those damn chickens.

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Corribus
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Unread postby Corribus » 16 Feb 2007, 17:06

I hope the paint is biodegradable...
"What men are poets who can speak of Jupiter if he were like a man, but if he is an immense spinning sphere of methane and ammonia must be silent?" - Richard P. Feynman

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Kareeah Indaga
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Unread postby Kareeah Indaga » 16 Feb 2007, 20:37

Corribus wrote:I hope the paint is biodegradable...
Seconded…

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ScarlettP
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Unread postby ScarlettP » 17 Feb 2007, 01:03

Just think! They could have planted Kudzu.


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