"Yeah, hi, I'm having trouble with one of my spells."
"Which spell would that be, Sir?"
"I'm trying to summon a boat."
"Then I suggest trying the 'summon boat' spell, Sir."
"That's what I'm doing! It won't work! It just says there is no boat to summon!"
"Ah, yes, that error message will appear when there is no boat to summon, Sir."
"But there is a boat - I paid for it myself."
"Sorry, Sir, we have no reports of such a malfunction. The boat is summoned by the spell when a boat is available."
"But I'm reporting it now!"
"Are you sure you have a boat available, Sir?"
"Listen, I can see the boat! It's right there! All I need is for the spell to..."
"Please hold, Sir."
"Wait!"
*muzak playing*
